POSTED ON August 17, 2016
Rough sex, for beginners especially, can be intimidating. But here’s the trick: honest and open communication with your partner. Isn’t that always the trick? Clearly lay out the groundwork beforehand, and thrilling sexual encounters are sure to follow. Get turned on with some of our tips for rough sex for beginners below!
Rough sex, more often than not, is a way to tap into our most animalistic, primal urges. As with many types of fetishes, including bondage and other facets of S&M, rough sex plays with our sense of power and control. For many people, rough sex is a way to experience a more aggressive form of passionate release. Even so, rough sex can be just as sensual – especially if you’re drawn to a little pain to go along with your pleasure.
It’s not always easy to talk about what turns us on, especially when those turn-ons involve something that comes off as potentially scary, like the pain that’s inevitably part of rough sex. For beginners or the most experienced, however, it’s equally important to explore what turns us on in loving, consensual ways with our partners. After all, a happy and healthy sex life is absolutely crucial to a well-balanced and successful relationship!
If your heart is set on seeing what rough sex has to offer, get your brain up to speed with some of our favorite ways to ease into exploring this adrenaline-pumping territory.
1. Talk dirty.
You might not think that talking dirty to one another is related to rough sex for beginners, but it’s what you say that counts here. Prepare yourself for the action by voicing what you want to do to each other during foreplay. Tell your partner how much you want him to grab your butt, pull your hair, or whatever it is that most turns you on about rough sex.
2. Grab each other.
Use a bit more force than you normally would, but remember that you should define what rough sex means to the both of you. For men, the biggest fear about rough sex is often that they don’t want to accidentally hurt their partners. But if you talk about what actually constitutes roughness in your minds, you’ll have a better time engaging in it together.
3. Pull hair.
Hair pulling is probably one of the most well-known aspects of rough sex for beginners. What can we say? If you’re into it, it can be incredibly erotic!
We’ve covered how to spank in the past, but this is prime ground to exploring rough sex for beginners. Start with your hands; use the Red Cheeks Spank Me Kit to heighten the sensations before with the luxurious Spank Me Creme, then cool things down afterwards with the Cool Down Mist. Work your way up to a toy like the Sinful Paddle for an even more intense experience!
This is a guide to rough sex for beginners, but if you know this is something you want to explore more deeply, you can do things like call each other names you would otherwise never, ever say (in an erotic context, being called something you’re not can be a huge turn-on), to more extreme actions like slapping and choking. Up the ante even more with fetish toys for rough sex like the Bare Bondage Riding Crop, Scandal Breathable Ball Gag With Cuffs, or the 5 Piece Hogtie Set.
As with anything that can be taken too far, be cautious and communicative about your turn-ons and you will have the hottest rough sex of your life! Have a specific question about rough sex or anything else to do with intimacy, love, and relationships? Ask Our Romance Specialist and you might just see the answer in our next column! As always, find the erotic lingerie and adult sex toys you’ve been lusting after at any time online or at a Lover’s Lane near you!