The holiday season can be stressful, and it’s easy to get lost in the hustle and bustle. Instead of focusing on our partner, we run around trying to be everything to everyone, neglecting them and ourselves in the process. The “12 Days of Loving” from Lover’s Lane are 12 simple suggestions to try each day leading up to Christmas (or whenever you can) to keep the spark alive in your relationship. Much less annoying than the similarly-titled Christmas carol, this romantic routine will remind you that the true magic of the holidays is found in the love you’ve built with your partner.
Day 1:
Look Deep into your partner’s eyes and tell them you love them with all your heart.
Sure, your partner most likely knows you love them, but it’s very nice to hear it from time to time. Going too long without hearing “I love you” can make someone feel neglected or taken for granted, so it’s important to say it regularly, and show them you really mean it. Take a quick, intimate moment to verbally remind your lover how you feel and watch them melt in your arms.
Day 2:
Give your partner a backrub.
Giving your partner a backrub is an easy way to show them you appreciate everything they do every day. Many people feel like they carry the weight of the world on their shoulders, and your soothing touch can make the stress of the world fade into the background. Not to mention it’s a great form of non-sexual physical intimacy…that may lead to more if you want it to! 😉
Day 3:
Do your partner’s chores for the day.
Take over your partner’s needful tasks for the day to give them a little more time to relax and focus on what they would like to do. Remember, it’s only extra special if you do their chores in addition to your own. This sweet gesture is unlikely to go unnoticed, and you might get something special under the mistletoe to say thanks!
Day 4:
Say the nicest thing you can think of to your partner.
Again, it’s not hard to feel taken for granted in a relationship without regular reminders that we’re appreciated. Pay your partner a genuine, from-the-heart compliment, or tell them your deepest and truest feelings for them that you’ve never quite expressed, and watch their eyes light up like a Christmas tree.
Day 5:
Give your partner the biggest hug you ever have.
Did you know the average person needs 8 hugs a day as a baseline for emotional well-being? Many people don’t get that many most days, so make it up to your lover with a hug that feels like 8 in 1! Embrace them in the best bear hug you’re capable of, and don’t let go until you’re both ready. Just enjoy the closeness and feel the calm as it works to boost both of your moods and your love for each other.
Day 6:
Bring home their favorite treat.
It doesn’t have to be much; just a little something to show them you’re thinking about them and that they deserve something special. A cupcake from their favorite bakery, their favorite candy bar or soda from the corner store, or a bottle of their favorite bubbles will be a sweet reminder of your love for them.
Day 7:
Do something nice and unexpected.
Whatever you think they would find to be a nice surprise, do it! Whether it’s offering to buy dinner on your way home so they don’t have to cook, taking the dog for its early morning walk so they can sleep in, or taking them to see a movie you know they’ve been wanting to see (even if you think you’ll hate it), doing something out of the ordinary that’s just for them will leave them feeling like they’re living in a Hallmark holiday movie.
Day 8:
Ask your partner if there is something that you can do for them.
This may be something handy they’ve been wanting you to do around the house, or maybe they have a deep sexual fantasy they’d like you to fulfil. Either way, it will be appreciated because it’s you wanting to do something just for them.
Day 9:
Make their favorite meal.
This one can be especially meaningful if it’s your partner that usually does the cooking; they’ll appreciate you taking over the responsibility for a day. Even if you’re the usual cook, though, it still shows you’re thinking about them to make their favorite dish.
Day 10:
Do the chore they asked you to do (that you’ve been putting off).
We probably all have a Honey-Do list or a Round-To-It list about things that need to be done around the house, right? Kick procrastination in the butt and give your partner a special surprise in the process. Figure out which task is the highest priority to your partner, then do it. Following through on simple promises like this shows a commitment to your relationship and a devotion to teamwork.
Day 11:
Tell your partner’s children or parents how much you love your partner and why.
The holiday season is a time for spreading the love around, so take a few minutes to sit down with your partner’s children (or your own children together) or your partner’s parents and tell them just how important their mom/dad/son/daughter is to you. It’s a good way to remind your partner just how much you love and value them. Maintaining strong family bonds and demonstrating healthy love is important to long-lasting relationships, and to raising children who will form healthy relationships in the future, too.
Day 12:
Ask your partner what would make them happy.
Their happiness is the focus here, so be willing to do whatever they want you to do to make them truly happy. Maybe it’s a sexual adventure in the bedroom, or maybe it’s you playing with the kids for a couple hours so they can have a good shower and a nap. No ask should be too big or too small, and this shows an unselfish commitment to your partner and their happiness.
