So, You’re Ready to Build Your Sex Room?

by Kristin T.

January 1, 2023


Alright, by now you’ve almost certainly watched the Netflix show, How to Build a Sex Room. If you haven’t – seriously – stop reading this, go watch it, then come back (it’s wonderful and worth, it, I promise)! While we’re all anxiously awaiting a second season, why not get your DIY on and start creating your own super sexy space?!? If 2022 was the year of the sex room show, 2023 is your year to make one a reality!

Have you made the new year’s resolution to prioritize your pleasure and have better sex yet? Because you should! What better way to make intimacy a priority in the new year than by designing and creating your very own sex room? If you can’t access (or afford) a world-renowned interior designer that specializes in sexy spaces, not to worry! We’re sharing ideas about how to design and build your own sex room! Read on for some things to consider before you head to the home improvement store to make sure you create a sensual space that’s all your own!

What room to use:

While the bedroom is the obvious choice for most people, it’s not the only option. If you have kids who regularly invade your sleeping quarters or just a very small bedroom, your bedroom may not always make the ideal romance retreat. Other possibilities just waiting for your sex room glow-up could include the basement, a disused three seasons room, a spare bedroom/abandoned office, or guest quarters above the garage. If there’s no room inside the house but you have lots of land, you can even take a cue from the show and try a purpose-built shed (climate controlled, obviously) outside! You want a space that’s accessible – you want to be able to use it whenever the mood strikes – and comfortable, but also hidden enough to give you plenty of privacy. Don’t forget to make the door lockable if there’s more than just the two of you at home!

What colors to decorate with:

Color can be a point of contention for some couples, so it’s important to discuss this and settle on something you both love. Rich, darker colors can help create a sensuous look, so think jewel tones (Emerald green, sapphire blue, ruby red, amethyst purple) and move a shade or two from there in either direction. Keeping things monochrome (various shades of one color) with little pops of a neutral like black or white can keep the room looking simple and timeless.

Pick colors that work with your ideal aesthetic, and don’t be afraid to stray away from any preconceived expectations you may have. Romantic boudoirs don’t have to be red, and BDSM dungeons don’t have to be black. Be creative and go with what you love.

How to appeal to the other senses:

Beyond color, think about adding interesting textures and different ways to appeal to your other senses. Think super-soft blankets and throw pillows, silky faux-fur rugs, and other rich, luscious textures you just want to run your fingers through or roll all over naked. Candlelight and soft, sensual instrumental music can help set the mood through your sense of sight and hearing.

Invoke your sense of smell with an essential oil diffuser for diffusing romantic fragrances like Jasmine, Neroli, or Ylang-ylang. Avoid overpowering artificial air freshener plug-ins. As much as you don’t want the room to constantly reek of sex, you want to be able to smell each other in the heat of the moment, as that helps you really connect during physical intimacy.

How to make it practical:

Think about what kinds of furniture and accessories you need and want in your sex room. A bed seems obvious, but make sure to choose a sturdy (and quiet) one. If it’s not the bed you’ll sleep in every night, you may be able to get away with a smaller one than you’re used to as well. That’s only a portion of your playground!

If you have the space and the budget, build a sex room that fulfils your every fantasy and desire. A custom sex swing or bespoke kink cage coffee table isn’t that far out of reach if you are handy yourself or willing to shop around from some kinky crafters online. Whether it’s a St. Andrews Cross or spanking bench for some BDSM bonanzas, or rubber sheets or a giant shower to accommodate watersports, think of your sex room as your play palace and make it exactly what you want it to be.

Don’t forget a mini-fridge to house the bubbly and bottled water…you’ve gotta stay hydrated during those marathon sex sessions, and you shouldn’t have to leave the room to do that!

And last but not least…

How to make it extra special for sex:

Don’t forget to include some creature comforts and conveniences that help you get in the mood. A fancy bar cart with your favorite drinks, a faux fireplace, or a high-end stereo system to blast your smooth and sexy music can all help make it special for you and your interests.

Deck the walls with beautiful erotic art prints that turn you on, or if you’re brave, get a boudoir or nude photo shoot of the two of you and display your love all around you. Add mirrors so you can watch yourselves or even a little video nook if you like to be your own voyeur. Dimmable lights, candles, soft canopies & draping, or a gorgeous vase full of flowers, feathers, and floggers can help turn a basic room into a truly sensual space. Watch the show for even more great inspiration, or check out Melanie Rose’s gallery of glam here.

Don’t forget your little bag of tricks:

…or box of tricks, or drawer of tricks, or closet of tricks. If you’re a fan of the show, you know Melanie Rose brings along a satchel of sexy surprises. These items help get couples talking about what they’re curious about trying, what they already love, and what is a hard no when it comes to sex toys and BDSM play. From floggers to butt plugs to furry handcuffs and everything in between, schedule a date together at a Lover’s Lane store or browsing on to discuss with your sweetie what you want to add to YOUR bag of tricks in the bedroom!

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