How Much Does Size Really Matter? (And How to Make What You Have Really Count)

by Christopher J.

January 6, 2024

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When it comes to considering the importance of penis size, we have to be completely honest. Does size matter? Yes. No. Maybe. It all depends on who you ask. And what their personal preferences are. Some might be turned on by length. Others by girth. Others associate pain and discomfort with larger penises.

When you start to examine statistics – as we will do – and when you read the myriad articles available pronouncing their penile size preferences, you realize that – like music, food or film proclivities – it’s all fairly subjective and depends on who’s on the receiving end. So, while there is no one definitive answer to what size wins the penis prize, let’s pull up some numbers and opinions.

Bad Girls Bible did a fairly extensive study on the manhood matter, based on a survey of 1,387 sexually active women to answer the question: Does size matter to women during penile-vaginal sex? Let’s look at a few of their numerous key findings and the contradictions that sometimes occur.

For example, while 91.2% of the women surveyed say that size matters for sexual satisfaction with certain penis sizes being too small for them, a sizeable percentage of women claim they don’t like large penises, with 83.4% of women saying they find some penises too big to be satisfying.

According to the survey, the most favored penis size for women, which Bad Girls Bible refers to as the “Goldilocks” range, is 6-8 inches. Answering the question of what the size might impact for them, 43.6% of women say penis size matters when deciding to date someone. Additionally, 47.4% of women report that penis size matters during a one-night stand, while 68.5% of women report that penis size matters in a friends-with-benefits situation.

Also, while 56.6% of women say that a partner possessing a penis that is too large could contribute to them ending their relationship, another 40.2% of women say they would consider cheating on a partner with a small penis. In this survey, a clear majority (64.5%) of women believe that penis length and width are equally important for their sexual satisfaction.

In “Does Penis Size Actually Matter?” an article written for Healthline by a woman and medically reviewed by a woman, Adrienne Santos Longhurst says: “Penis size is not nearly as important as the media would make you think. In fact, bigger penises are more likely to lead to pain, gagging, and tearing. When it comes to giving pleasure, size has nothing to do with it.”

Longhurst’s answer to the question is no, penis size does not matter, especially when considering desirability or function. The qualifier for what the dick delivers is always the partner’s personal preference.

“Its size has zero bearing on its ability to give and receive pleasure or do any of what it’s supposed to do,” she writes. “That’s not to say that some people don’t prefer a bigger or smaller one, but that’s a matter of perceived preference, kind of like pineapple on pizza. To each their own.”

Although a larger penis can lead to a larger risk of injury or infection and a wider girth can cause pain, especially during anal sex or cause a gag reflex during oral, Longhurst addresses ways to avoid those challenges in a different article for Healthline.

On the flip side, she opines, the opposite dimensions on the measuring stick are not necessarily bad. “A smaller D is automatically easier to handle, which means all involved can focus on pleasure rather than pain or trying to figure out how the eff you’re gonna get THAT in there,” Longhurst writes. “It’s certainly easier for fitting in the mouth. And when it comes to anal, a smaller peen is basically top dog. Like any size penis, any perceived shortcomings are easily — and enjoyably — rectified with the right position.”

Again, so much of great sex comes down to other factors, such as experience and expertise in the fine art of sexual intercourse and other pleasures stimulated by other body parts – e.g., hands, fingers, tongues, lips – or by how much the person is turned on by their partner’s face or eyes or hair or voice or laugh.

“A big penis does matter to some women, but there are fewer of those out there than there are women who think a slightly below average penis is just fine,” say Amanda Chatel and Bustle’s editors in their piece about the size of the man’s piece. “For many, it’s more about how you use it and where you can excel in other areas because intercourse is just one part of sex; sex encompasses so much more.”

Still, it would be unrealistic to say that many men don’t obsess about the size of their penis and how it relates to their masculinity or virility, especially when they are younger and feeling the call of the wild, shall we say.

“A lot of men have concerns about penile length,” comments Ryan Anderson, Ph.D., in his Psychology Today article “Size Does Matter” about the phallus obsession. “Many stem from a dramatic overestimation of the average penis length. A comprehensive study of over 15,000 men found the average erect penis length to be just over 13 cm. New research suggests that women consider the ideal penis size to be only a bit longer at just over 6 inches (16 cm).”

So, while men can become focused on the belief that “bigger is better” in the way that women may feel about the male love-tool, Anderson says, that is only accurate up to a point; many sexperts questioning the veracity of that particular manhood maxim.

“It turns out that all of this is in their heads, sort of,” Anderson concludes. “A 2014 study found that although both men and women reported the ideal penis size to be greater than average penis size, men overestimated women’s preferences: they thought that ladies wanted bigger penises than they actually did.” So, guys, it’s okay to lay off the literal dick-measuring contests and the fears about where you fall on the measuring tape. It’s all about your partner’s personal preferences just learn how to provide better pleasure for your partner whatever you’re packing.

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