Today may be “That Sucks Day”, but we want to talk about something that definitely DOESN’T suck…or blow…except in the fun ways! We’re talking about oral sex! More importantly, we’re learning some slick tricks to make your next oral sex session even hotter! No matter what parts you’re going down on, read on for some truths and tips to make your next mouth job blow your partner away!
First, a few myths to bust:
Oral sex isn’t real sex.
There’s a common misconception that oral sex isn’t real sex. It is. While can be and is frequently utilized as part of foreplay, it is a complete sex act all on its own. Penetration doesn’t have to occur for something to count as sex. Oral is just as sensual and intimate – possibly more so – as any other kind of sex. It’s okay to enjoy it as a standalone pleasure party!
Oral sex is safer than “actual” sex.
This is also false. The only thing oral sex is safer from is the chance of pregnancy. All those kinda common STIs that can be passed through more traditional below-the-belt sex can be passed through oral sex. If you are with a new partner or unsure of each other’s status, you should use a condom or a dental dam for oral sex to prevent the spread of STIs.
Tips for All Types:
Whether you’re performing fellatio (oral sex on a penis), cunnilungus (oral sex on a vulva), or analingus (oral sex on an anus), there are certain hard & fast rules and recommendations that apply to all of them. Learn the necessary lingo and try these tips to blow your partner away in the sack.
- Communicate: When your partner is going down on you, let them know what you love. This will often happen naturally through your sighs and moans, but if you’re not a natural noisemaker during sex, make sure to tell them. It’s also important to communicate as the giver. Asking what is working and what isn’t, and being honest if you’re having a hard time with something, will prevent a lot of disappointing or awkward moments of failure.
- Hygiene is key: Many people think cleanliness is THE MOST IMPORTANT THING when it comes to oral sex, and they’re not wrong. While penises and vulvas always have natural smells and substances that occur down there, everyone is going to have a better time if things are freshly cleaned. Take a shower shortly before your oral adventures, or use unscented wipes in a pinch if you don’t have access to a shower.
- Clean up your dirty mouth: Oral hygiene is important before oral sex, too…though you may not go about it in the same way as usual. Rather than brushing your teeth just before performing oral, rinse your mouth well with mouthwash instead. Brushing can open up microtears in your mouth and gums which can make you more susceptible to infections.
- Make it tolerable: Not everyone loves giving oral. I suppose there may be people out there who don’t love getting it, either, but I haven’t met many of them. Genitals are weird and sometimes kind of gross. We may have all sorts of very natural aversions to going downtown. If the smells, tastes, appearance, or gag reflex is off-putting to you, but you still really want to please your partner in that way, do what you need to do to make it pleasant for you. Making sure the receiver is clean is the most important. Beyond that, blindfolds (fun for the giver, receiver, or both!), flavored lubes or oral sex gels, strong mints, and even tasty sprays that can help numb the gag reflex, may all go a long way towards helping you blow your lover away.
Be a Pro Penis Pleaser:
If your partner has a penis, here are some pro tips to help give the most mind-blowing BJ they’ve ever experienced:
Keep things *moist*:
*Cringe* I hate that word, but it feels necessary here, sadly. Lots of wetness – either in the form of saliva or lube (flavored is ideal for oral) – is important for a slippery smooth, sensual BJ. If you don’t naturally produce a lot of spit, Flintts mints may help make your mouth water for an awesome oral aid. Bonus: they create a tingly sensation in your mouth that may transfer to his cock and feel really, really cool!
Practice on other parts:
Don’t leave the sensual sucking just for his penis. Stick a finger (or toe, if that’s your thing) in your mouth and go to town while looking at him seductively as excellent foreplay to oral. You can also use your tongue and mouth on his groin crease and testicles as you’re building up to the main event. Sucking on other body parts makes him immediately picture you sucking on his penis and can be really, really hot.
Get your hands involved:
Use your hands to gently grip and grope his member. Try sliding it up and down the shaft in the same direction as your mouth, or switch things up and try moving it towards and away from your mouth as you thrust it in and out of your mouth. Everyone has a different preference. Lubrication is important here, so keep things nice and wet or use lube if saliva isn’t enough.
Suck & blow:
While ‘blow job’ is a bit of a misnomer because it feels like you’re mostly sucking on a penis, try experimenting with blowing, too. Puff gently around the penis like you’re blowing up a wide-mouthed balloon, or remove his member from your mouth from time to time to gently breathe a warm breath or blow a cool stream on his penis. The temperature difference can be sensationally seductive!
Be a Cunning Cunnilinguist:
If your partner has a vulva, you get all sorts of parts to play with using that skilled tongue of yours! Try these tricks to really impress them away with your newfound cunnilingus prowess:
Try different techniques:
The tongue can make the most precise articulations of all the muscles in the human body…use that to your advantage! Use your tongue on the clitoris; try circling motions, flickering motions, harder thumping or tapping, and closing your lips to suck on it. Move your tongue back & forth, up & down, and in tiny circles. Pay attention to the insides & outsides of the labia, and the rest of the vulva, too, licking it as a big tease on the way to the clit. Try swirling and sliding your tongue in and out of her vagina, too. It only has to go in ever-so-slightly to make her scream with delight.
Use your hands:
Don’t forget the importance of your hands for enhancing your cunnilingus. Use your fingertips to help keep her clitoral hood out of the way for the best access to her clit. Slide a finger or two in and out of her vagina while you lavish your oral attention on her clit. Stroke her labia, groin crease, and upper thighs as you build in intensity. Once you’re good at multitasking, you can use your hands to play with her nipples, anus, or anything else she finds pleasurable while you’re going down!
Go for new records:
Once you get really good at licking your way around her lady bits, set new personal achievement goals and do your best to meet them. Set a goal for how long you’re going to go down for, how many orgasms you’re going to give her (yes, those of us with vulvas have the joy of being able to have multiple Os without a break or refractory period), how loud you’re going to make her scream, etc. Then do whatever it takes to break those records and set new, higher ones! Have fun!
