Snag the (Adult) Toys Santa Forgot

by Kristin T.

December 26, 2023


So, you weren’t quite naughty enough to get coal for Christmas, but your naughty side was overlooked completely in the gift department? Here are some of the hottest toys you can use that cash or gift card on to make your own post-holiday private parties very merry, indeed.

For a Very Jolly G-Spot:

If you have a vagina and have discovered the amazing pleasure of g-spot stimulation, then you know how important it can be to have a great G-spot toy in your amorous arsenal. Often the only way many women can achieve a squirting orgasm, a vibe with a specially angled tip is one of the best ways to reach it for solo or partnered play. For classic G-spot vibration, the Royals The Scepter G-Spot Vibrator or the ultra powerful Le Wand Gee would be the perfect fit. If you’re looking to change up sensations a bit, try a tapping G-spot vibe like the Love to Love Swap, or the stroking g-spot bead in the Evolved Jammin G Dual Stim Vibrator – it’s got a rabbit for your clit, too. Get the best of both worlds with the Playtime Double Trouble Intense Flick Vibrator, which gives you a classic curved & textured vibe with 7 vibration patterns on one end, and a unique fluttering finger-like shape to stimulate your G-spot and inner vaginal walls with 10 modes of tapping speed & intensity. You’ll wonder how you ever did without!

To Level Up Your Jerking Off:

While there’s absolutely nothing wrong with always beating your meat manually, sometimes you just want to try something beyond your 5 fingers and palm. Take your stroking to the space age with the Rocket Man Sucking & Vibrating Masturbator or the Zero Tolerance Stroking Buddy, complete with some out-of-this world sensations from its rolling, thrusting bead action. If you’re just after a realistic look and feel without all the bells & whistles, the PDX Plus 360 Banger or the slightly simpler Lovergirl Natasha’s Pussy & Mouth Stroker should be a perfect fit with many choices of how to use them for all your favorite fantasies.

To Kiss & Caress Your Clit:

The Rose was certainly THE sex toy of 2023, so you may be a bit disappointed if you didn’t get one in your stocking. Never fear – grab your own as we head into the new year! There are so many variations of this clitoris-kissing, suction-based pleasure provider, why settle for just the basic? Try out the supersonic LELO Sona 2 to surround your clit in sensual sound or the Rosarium Loretta Thumping Vibe for a completely different sensation than the suction flowers. The less floral but luxurious Womanizer Premium 2 comes from the originator of Pleasure Air technology, and will help you enjoy powerful orgasms well into the future.

For Titillating Your Tushy:

Since your Secret Santa probably didn’t buy you a butt plug, sometimes you just have to take things into your own hands. For those who need to add more rear assets to their pleasure portfolio, you can’t go wrong with B-Vibe. The Vibrating Heart Plug is petite and adorable, or commit to the 7 Piece Anal Training Set if you really want to work up to the big bois. Go for plug that vibrates, or keep it simple and cute with a silicone training set kissed with gems or a chrome jeweled plug. For those advanced anal explorers, enjoy a rim job even if you’re going solo with the Starry Nights Remote Control Rimming Plug. And remember…butt stuff can be enjoyed by anyone who has a butt!

For Throwing a Party for Your Prostate:

For our penis-having pals, backdoor pleasure is even more possible for them thanks to the prostate. Try out some new toys made just for stimulating that little gland until your eyes roll back in your head. Most of them can be used for solo sessions or during partnered sex, so trying one may be a fun thing to add to your new year’s resolutions. Vibrating prostate massagers like the Love Essentials Prostate Pleasure plug or the Anal Affair Prostate Massager paired with a C-ring will do all the hard work of stimulating your prostate for you! Enjoy the remote controlled power and unique rotating bead sensations from the Gender Fluid Frission Anal Vibe, perfectly poised to press on your prostate. Or, opt for prostate pleasure without the vibrations with the beloved Helix Syn Trident Prostate Massager from Aneros, perfect for both beginners and advanced prostate players.

To Enjoy Angelic Vibes Anywhere:

Bullet vibes are great to use on almost any erogenous zone, and everyone – regardless of gender – should have at least 1 in their pleasure chest. Whether you prefer the chilly, firm touch of metal like in the Intense Orgasm bullet, or the silky silicone of the Sensuelle Iconic Bullet, you can make your own ways to play. Try them on your clitoris, nipples, all around the vulva and vaginal opening, or anywhere else that feels good. Some, like the LeWand Chrome Grand Bullet are even powerful enough that they can be used to comfortably help break up sinus congestion by running them beneath your ears. Whether disguised as a lipstick or as trendy jewelry, they can also be super discreet! Some even come with cute little charging cases making them perfect for traveling while keeping your secrets.

The LeWand Grand Bullet even has a cute little halo and nubby massage tip for extra fun!

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