It’s back-to-school time, and the Intimacy Advisor is here with a lesson from your new favorite subject: Adult Sex Ed! Let’s face it…unless you went to college for a degree in human sexuality, your formal education probably didn’t include many lessons like this! If it did, tell me what school you went to, seriously! Vagina-havers, read on as we dive into the six (yes, 6!) different orgasms you’re capable of achieving, and how to have them.
Before we go deeper (phrasing), let’s start out by discussing what an orgasm even is! According to Sherry Ross, MD, “an orgasm is a physical reflex that occurs when muscles tighten during sexual arousal, and then relax through a series of rhythmic contractions.” Each and every climax may feel different in terms of intensity and duration. There are many ways to reach orgasm, though not all people may have an easy time achieving certain kinds. In addition to a physical release, the big O is also an emotional one, allowing you to feel closer to your partner, or even just help you to de-stress after a long day.
To clarify, when we say there are 8 orgasms, it’s not so much that there are 8 different types of orgasms, as it is there are 11 possible ways to bring on an orgasm. Physiologically, the same thing is happening in your body for all kinds; each one we list here is just a different road to get to pleasure-town.
1. Clitoral Orgasm:
This is probably the type of orgasm that is experienced the most frequently & most easily by most ladies. It’s achieved by stimulating the glans clitoris; the portion of the clitoris we can see, at the top of the vulva, above the urethra. The entire clitoris is actually much larger than that little pleasure button, but that’s the easiest place to stimulate it from. Sexual pleasure seems to be the one and only function the clitoris is there for, so we might as well make the most of it!
How to have one:
Clitoral orgasms, quite simply, require stimulation of the glans clitoris. The exact motion, speed, and pressure needed to achieve orgasm is different for everyone, so there are many different ways to try if you’ve never had much luck before. Alone, try stimulating your clitoris with a vibrating toy made to target your clit, or do it with your finger. Try different motions on and around the surface of your clitoris, including pressing, tapping, circling, or even gentle squeezing. With a partner, have them perform those same actions with either a finger or their tongue (they can add in sucking, too); different sensations are generated by each. One side of the glans clitoris may even be more sensitive than the other, so experiement and find what feels good for you.
2. G-Spot Orgasm:
This is probably the most controversial variety of orgasm, because it’s still hotly contested among doctors and scientists whether or not the G-spot is even a real thing. If you DO have one and can experience pleasure there, you would find it on your front vaginal wall, a few inches inside the vagina; the correct area might feel a little spongier than the tissues surrounding it. Some doctors call it the female equivalent of the prostate gland in the male anatomy. It can be sensitive to touch and pressure, and those things often feel good enough to help some folks climax!
How to have one:
G-spot stimulation can generate an intense need-to-pee sensation, so make sure you empty your bladder first so you don’t hold yourself back from climax. A finger in a come-hither curl is usually just the right length to locate and stimulate your G-spot with varying levels and speeds of pressure and motion. There are also toys that are specially curved to hit your G-spot just right, and some women may find that their G-spot can be stimulated during P in V intercourse.
3. Blended Orgasm:
If you can achieve both clitoral and G-spot orgasms without too much difficulty, a blended orgasm is the next logical progression. Basically, a blended orgasm is just an orgasm generated by stimulating two different erogenous zones at the same time. The pairing of the clitoral and G-spot orgasms is the most common (and also the most likely to lead to squirting), but it can be literally any other combination. Clit and nipples, G-spot and anal…whatever combo does it for you will pay off big time when you sync them up!
How to have one:
Find whatever kinds of stimulation bring you to orgasm most easily (maybe a couple from this list?), and do them both in combination until they join in one epic fireworks finale! That’s it! You can stimulate yourself to a blended orgasm, have a partner do both while you coach them, or you can each have a hand in the game. It might take a little practice to get the timing right so that each orgasm-triggering sensation comes together (get it?), but when you get it right, WHOOO BOY!
4. A-Spot/C-Spot Orgasm
The A-Spot and the C-Spot are in slightly different locations, but they’re so darn close and similar, we’re going to talk about them together. The C-spot refers to your cervix, and the nerve endings around your cervix nearest the opening to your uterus. The A-spot refers to the area high on the front (or anterior) wall of the vagina, just beneath the cervix. Both of these areas are highly sensitive to pressure, and can be stimulated only through deep penetration. An orgasm generated here can be very intense, even causing your whole uterus to contract. As long as you can find a way to make the deep, thrusting sensations more pleasurable than painful, you may discover a whole new way to orgasm!
How to have one:
The successful stimulation of these areas in a way that feels good relies on your body being very, very aroused. It’s best to save the deep, penetrative sex for the end of your play session, after lots of foreplay and maybe even some other types of orgasm (isn’t it great being able to have lots in short succession?). If your partner is well-endowed with a penis, they may be able to reach these spots on their own, or you can try a strap-on or other larger dildo to hit the spot. Use lube to reduce friction, be gentle, and start applying a thrusting motion and see what feels good. As long as your lover isn’t trying to punch your cervix out of your body, it should feel amazing.
5. Nipple-based Orgasm
While an orgasm can actually come from ANY erogenous zone being stimulated in just the right way, the nipples are particularly sensitive to touch which creates pleasure, sometimes strong enough to trigger an orgasm. Your nipples are dense in nerve endings, and having them licked, caressed, blown on, or even squeezed can send electrical impulses down to your genitals. It is possible for some to not really feel much when it comes to their nipples, and that’s fine & normal, too.
How to have one:
Every body is different, and the way you enjoy having your nipples stimulated is different, too. Stimulate or have your partner stimulate your nipples in different ways…and see if you can find one that you can feel all the way down in your clitoris. Licking, sucking, caressing with a finger or a whole hand, or gentle squeezing are all popular choices. Some prefer up/down/side to side stimulation, and some prefer sweeping, circling motions around their nipples and areolas. Keep an open mind and see if you can make the most out of this sensational superhighway to your pleasure center!
6. Anal Orgasm
Last but certainly not least we have the trusty anal orgasm…and yes, vulva owners, I’m still talking to you! This one is hit -or-miss for a lot of lasses…you either LOVE anal stimulation, or you REALLY don’t…or maybe you haven’t tried it yet. If you fall into the former category (or learn that you do when you try), lucky you! You have one more solid way to reach the big O than some of your peers. Anal stimulation can bring vagina-havers to climax in a couple different ways. First, there are shared nerve endings between the anterior wall of the rectum and the vagina. Additionally, the “legs” of the clitoris reach all the way back to your perineum area and to your anus, so back door play can fire up your clit.
How to have one:
The key to anal play is to start out slowly. Start out by just circling and putting a finger’s worth of pressure on the rectum to see if you can possibly experience pleasure here. You can explore yourself or with a partner, though the first time you play inside might be best as a solo mission. Use lots of lube, relax, and insert your finger or a small anal toy gently and slowly. Go with the natural shape and path your anus makes, but you should probably be angling up towards your belly button; that’s how you hit those same nerves as in your vagina. If anything hurts, back off, but you may find that you can experience climax in this way alone, or as part of a blended O!